Suck it up

You know when u wake up in the middle of the night without any apparent reason, you tend to have all these thoughts dwelling upon each other. Well at least i had. And you would have make-believe scenes from your mind and say things you can't say in real life. It's delusional. You start to reason with your own alter ego. Shut off and push away all emotions. Just trying to get that eyes shut and go back into deep slumber.

But it might not be as easy as it sounds. When you have these whole lots of thoughts and emotions escalating, you're starting to realize that all of these are merely bullshits. That sometimes things don't go your way. And people will always be people. Yes at times, inconsiderate, impatient, irrational and not to mention idiotic too. Mind says suck it up, go hard or go home. While alter ego succumbs with let's just get the hell out of here. Heart? Well heart could only cry tears of helplessness under your warm covers.

It's frustrating really. Up to this point you might think I'm insane. Rest assured, i am not. Partially, perhaps. Well I don't know. Nonetheless I am still in a right state of mind to make decision, to know what's good and what's not for my own self. So I guess I don't require any medical attention.

In case you're wondering yes I am a drama queen. A freaking drama queen.